Moving into a new season of life can be hard. (See Part 1: one-truth-to-survive-seasonal-changes) But moving into a new season with one foot firmly planted in the past season can be earth shaking. Somewhat like the tectonic plates of the earth’s crust coming in contact, “grinding violently against each other, causing earthquakes and volcano eruptions”. Sound familiar? Um, yes. More often than not, seasonal transitions are not cut and dry, but involve one foot planted in both seasons.
Two memories bubble to the surface to illustrate this phenomenon.
One occurred late spring, as we road-tripped across several states to scout out schools with the same high school senior vaulting his way to state competition and graduation, while a younger sister felt her way along the precarious path of early teen years. At the same time we were planning our first family wedding for a daughter who was also a full-time nursing student. With one foot still firmly planted in the land of “parenting teens”, we were taking a giant step into the season of “married children”. Those two seasons coinciding were like the great plates of the earth moving against each other, and the ground began to quake beneath us.
Flash forward several years. Goosebumps erupted as a brand new season opened into our lives. The welcomed season of “grand parenting” rubbed against the intricacies of the yo-yo season from “empty nesting” part of the year and a college age child at home the other. Tectonic plate grinding begins when a mama desires to be full-in both seasons at the same time.
The day scheduled to resettle daughter #2 back into college life, three hours away, was also the day our week old granddaughter was diagnosed with jaundice. Sitting with daughter #1, waning with weary and worry, she attempted assurance she’d be fine while I accompanied her college bound sister. Since we were both just a bit weepy in the moment, I asked, “but who will cry with you?” We gazed across the room at her husband and brother looking like two deer in the headlights. Clearly not the two of them.
Surviving colliding seasons threatens us on all levels: physical, mental and emotional. And if not careful, spiritual. Just the overwhelming number of balls to keep in the air makes your head spin and welcomes exhaustion.
When seasons collide and keeping our footing becomes difficult, a life-saving checklist can help:
___Let go of what can wait. In our task-driven, habitual lives we begin to think everything we do is crucial. That we must continue to do what we’ve always done. Reality check: some things can be put aside for weeks, months, and even years until the ground shaking subsides. A time will come to go back and recover what’s been neglected, or to evaluate and release that task, acknowledging it’s not as important as it once was.
___Call in the troops. We don’t have to do it alone. Our culture promotes self-sufficiency and DIY mindsets that keep us behind our fences, unwilling to peek over the gate to see if there is someone who can come alongside us to lend a hand, or a heart. Just having a support system where we share our joys and frustrations when two seasons side-swipe can give us the boost we need to get through in one piece.
___Feel the feelings. Someone going through a clashing-of-the-seasons I had just been through asked, “How did you manage?” My answer surprised even myself, “I cried once a day.” But it was true. When a quiet, alone moment presented itself, I let my guard down and felt all the feelings for a few moments. Tears become stress-relieving streams. They express emotions and feelings words cannot. A miraculous gathering of stamina unfolds when pent up emotions are allowed to be felt and then released.
___Keep priorities straight. Don’t permit the urgent to crowd out the important. Time with God and those in our intimate circle always come first. Work hard to neglect neither. With ruthless vigor, hack away at the unnecessary to give yourself to these two priorities.
Critical things will fall into place when we keep God in His.
Energy flows from empty reserves when reliance shifts from self to Savior.
Wisdom presents itself in both word and deed when the channel of communication with God flows wide open.
In the chaos, pause to recognize the shifting seasons. Enjoy the final moments of the passing phase even as you open your heart to challenges and joys, colors and shadows, of the new dawn bursting into your world. Your Abba Father has been active preparing this season for you; and you for this season. He’ll hold your hand, helping you keep balance, until the two plates stop shifting, and both feet are firmly planted again in one.
Photo by Jonathan Auh on Unsplash
